Is It National Elect A Pervert Day?

Only time will tell. The people of Alabama will soon show their stripes.

Praise the lard! Let some backlash of sanity envelop us all! Let us drive the ebil from our midst! Let the people see the error of the Republican parties ways! Let them vote as sane and rational people and not puppets of Faux News and the lying orange haired evil one!

Too much to ask for eh?

But on a positive note I’m halfway to becoming a hellfire and brimstone preaching preacher, I just have to get this whole believing in an invisible friend thing straightened out.

C’mon Guys. We Have to Do Better Than This.

I’m sure everyone with a television has heard about the moronic maroon in Alabama. Now it’s (Noooo!) Al Franken. Then there was all the hoo ha at Faux News. And we have the Trumpish pussy grabbing Trump, and the list just goes on and on and on.

It appears we just can’t help ourselves. By we, I mean guys in general not me personally. Though there was this one time I did tell a lady I did not know that she was pretty, I immediately saw that it made her uncomfortable, and I still feel bad about that. I have (mostly) always strived to be gentlemanly towards the opposite sex, and almost always prefer to be the quiet guy in the room (there is a lot to learn from that perspective). Now that does not mean I haven’t had my encounters with the opposite sex. You know why?

Because if they are interested they will let you know! Ok? I know from experience you don’t have to be the guy that can talk any woman out of her good sensibilities in 20 minutes or less (my brother is a fine example.) You don’t have to be a big Billy Bad Ass, you don’t have to be flamboyant and loud, you don’t have to be the super jock, and  you sure don’t need to be somebody that thinks they are Mr. Bigshit just because of wealth and fame or whatever it is that makes someone think they are Mr. Bigshit… to gain the attentions of the opposite sex. And Mr. Bigshit, you sure as hell do not have special freedoms to maul, molest, harass, or otherwise misbehave in general towards women because of your perceived status! Let’s just be ourselves, and keep our hands to ourselves, and stop being jerks. Alright? If a woman is interested in you, she will let you know. Until then be a gentleman goddammit!

Now for the umpteenth time, ladies, I apologize for the behavior of my gender. We aren’t all this bad I swear.

All of you jackasses, and you know who you are, go to your room, think about what I have said, and do not come out until you have some understanding of it! Next time I won’t be as nice. (Is there no one out there to have this talk with their sons?)

Alabama Asshat Loses His Hat

His judge hat. The hat he is wearing now is “Officially Retired”  (I’m using hat in this instance as an indicator of ones job, and because I can tie that in with asshat)

The great Chief Justice Roy Moore, an overt x-ian, you know the kind no one likes, the kind that feels compelled to defy law in favor of their personal beliefs, was suspended (without pay, yay!) for the rest of his term for being an asshat.

Seven months after the Supreme Court ruled in favor of gay marriage, Mr. Asshat mandated that Alabama judges continue to enforce Alabama’s ban on gay marriage. Thus defying federal law in favor of his religious views. I suppose to some that makes him an excellent x-ian (oxymoron alert) to many it makes him, well…an asshat.

This is the same judge you may remember from back in 2003, who defied the order to remove a 10 commandments monument from a public courthouse. He got into hot water for that as well, he was suspended then too, but the slimy bastard was reelected (how?) back to his job in an election back in 2012. Do only RWCRFM’s (Right Wing Conservative Republican Fundamentalist Morons) only vote in elections? If that is the case we are in trouble come November! Hopefully they will be too senile to find the voting locations…