So… Where Is Heaven?

The notion crossed my mind recently and being the curious sort I Googled it. I found many claims of heaven being for sure real. Claims of it being some ethereal place somewhere. Claims of it existing on an astral plane. Bible verses as proof it is there, but the where is never mentioned. Bible claims that it is among the atmosphere of earth (I pity the fools that would be there, right now. Also I do wonder if jets fly through frequently? Boy that would mess up a hair day.)ย  Claims that Jesus is there as I speak, building mansions for all the good x-ians. Damn good thing he was a carpenter! Put those skills to use Jesus!

All of my life I have heard of heaven. People tend to look up when they mention it. I have looked up too. Didn’t see it there, anywhere. I have a multitude of telescopes that I have looked up with as well. I have seen galaxies thousands of light years away, nebulas in their grand splendor, star clusters of the open and globular varieties, comets, planets, double stars, triple stars, quadruple stars, planetary nebula, and multitudes of stars along one of the spiral arms of our Milky Way. I didn’t see heaven in any of those places. Did I perhaps miss it? The Hubble telescope has been taking pictures out there for a LONG time now, I haven’t seen any pics of heaven yet. I’m sure it’s on the list of things to do… right?

The thing is, if you are going to base an entire freaking religion on the premise that all the good people will go to this heaven when they die, why in the hell can’t you at least point in the general direction that this supposed place exists? Claims of its existence are bountiful, everybody seems to just know it exists, but not a one of them can show me where. I’ve yet to see any gods yet either as a matter of fact. Odd.

Heaven. That paradise we are all told of. That place where all of lifes miseries and aggravations no longer exist. A place where we are simply content to be because we are with our gods. That place where grandma and grandpa are waiting for us, still very much alive and happy to be. The place where Fido and Guppy went when they died. The place where margaritas, good bourbon, and medical quality weed flow like water along the Danube (hey you pick your heaven, I’ll pick mine.)

A place no one apparently really knows where in the hell it actually is… ๐Ÿ™‚ย  Which makes me think someone is full of shit. Every religion across the globe has a heaven to promise its adherents. They line the pews every Wednesday and twice on Sunday, dropping their afterlife insurance payment in the collection plate, but none of them have a clue where the fuck this final payoff, heaven, is. Pardon me while I… Lol!

The moral of the story folks, is do not just be content with what the preachers tell you, or what the people you may know heard from their preacher, and are now convinced it is factual. Do a little research of your own, ask questions until you are satisfied with the answer.

There are those in religion who would lie to you, and gladly take your money. You know why? Because they never have to actually deliver on their con, and they are pretty damn sure you aren’t going to ask for your money back once you are dead! Next time someone tells you heaven is real, ask them where the heck it is! For me, okay? ๐Ÿ˜‰

FWIW, heaven or hell is IMO what we tend to make for ourselves in this life. Here is hoping you all have a slice of whatever you perceive as heaven. I couldn’t imagine life without a smile, a laugh, and good time with friends/family. At least every once in a while.

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