My grandmother, on my fathers side, made it to 100 years of age. I loaded up the wife and kids and we made the trek to Ankeny Iowa, to celebrate the accomplishment.
She had been in a nursing home for some time, she could get around still, albeit difficult. Her mind, still sharp as a tack, I mean laser focus. She was really happy I, well we, had made the trip. It was a damn pleasure to be there. The kids got to meet their great grandma, and I got to visit, knowing that given the distance, it might be the last time I’d get see her.
As we were there, she had little to say about her 100 yr. landmark. She didn’t think it was a big deal. In fact, she looked at me and said, “it’s nice I guess, but I’m ready to go.” Which gave me a moments pause, wasn’t expecting to hear that. Most everyone she knew when she grew up, had already passed away. Grandpa died when I was a young teen, the first death in the family who I knew, and it hit me hard. They always treated my like royalty when I could visit. So other than my dad and his wife, she sort of had no one to relate to.
She had polio as a child, and always walked with an unusual gait. Never kept her from getting things done, and never a moments complaint. Any time I was there visiting, which wasn’t often, I was always trying to find things I could help with. I fetched water from the well, they had no indoor plumbing, and you had to use a pump handle to fill up the bucket. There was even an outhouse out back. That’s just the way it was. Even though times had changed significantly, they used what they had, and it worked well enough they felt no need to make the upgrades. This was not the only family we had, who still lived this way. I never gave it a second thought. It just seemed normal, even though since I was old enough to remember, I’d always had the benefit of indoor plumbing. Except when visiting our older relatives.
So, anyway, grandma had lived to 100 years of age. She had a good life, and the aches, the pains, the loss of friends and family, the feeling of isolation, it all added up for her, she was just ready to go.
She did not live to see 101.
There’s something to learn there I think. As appealing as living a long life might be, there will come a point where, the body, the mind, have just had enough. That’s where she was.
We can all only hope, with as much time we are allowed, we can make the best of what may come, and hopefully die quietly in our sleep.
Evidence Based Reality 
Well written and expressed. I agree with your final statement. When it’s time to go, I hope I’ve lived a pleasant life and pass away peacefully in my sleep. It’s all we can really ask for, I believe.
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Yeah, we should all be so lucky.
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She was ready to go? Go where? 😁
Really though, how nice to see family and listen to the old folks stories. I was at my grandmas 99th birthday and she was the same as alway–sharp as a tack and angry, but had a difficult life and buried three husbands along the way. I’d be ready to go to, but where?
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Oddly enough, she never said “to heaven” or some such.
I think she just meant, to pass.
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As long as I have my faculties in good working order, I dont mind living to 250. That way I can see all my enemies die 😀
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I hear that. I sure hope I get a chance to piss on that orange fuckers grave.
But at 250, I think I’d have had enough well before then.
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The orange man is around for a while.
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Well stated. Most people say they want to live forever, but at 150 we would all be drooling in a wheelchair somewhere. Your Grandma had the right of it and the blessing to have retained her faculties until the end.
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A lot of people are already there by 90.
Having a chronic pain condition, I could not imagine the horror of sitting in that wheelchair, in massive pain, 24/7, and unable to say, or do anything to address it.
Hell on earth.
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If a person stays healthy and mentally alert, the journey into old age can be comparatively pleasant. If not, it can be a struggle. Overall, I think that “feeling of isolation” is probably the worst part of growing old. Friends, relatives, even sometimes children, often precede you, leaving you “alone.”
You mentioned your grandmother was still alert. I think this is probably one of the most difficult parts of growing old … your body and mind aren’t always on the same time scale.
In any event, I agree with Jeff. When it’s time to go, I hope I will simply close my eyes for the final time.
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BTW, in deference to Jim, I should probably have said … “When it’s time for my life to end …” 😎
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Yep, she saw two sons die before she went. She outlived any friends she had. While my dad was still there with her right to the end, she still felt alone in the world. No one to relate to.
My wife and I are the same age, with almost a month difference between us. We get each others jokes. And the “remember whens?”
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My grandma always expected to live to be a hundred, and she did exactly that. She was sharp and functioning well up until she was 98. She finally had to move into a home, and hung on until 100. We had a big blowout party for her, and while she was starting to get a bit mentally vague, she knew the party was for her and why. After the party she just kind of let go, and was gone in a couple of months.
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Very similar for my grandma. I think she managed another 6 months.
But, I know she was ready.
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I echo many commenters sentiments about making it past 9-decades. At some point your quality of life just keeps nose diving. I mean, what’s the point in putting your dear loved ones thru exhausting hell keeping you breathing, active, and mentally sharp? When it is time… it is TIME to just say, “This just isn’t worth it, for me nor my dearest family members trying so hard.”
So glad you got to see her one last time Shell. ❤️
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Spot on Prof.
…me too. She was a tough old bird. I mean that as the highest compliment a tough old dog can give.
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Hi shelldigger. While many commenters have commented on the end of life which as what the post was about, the earlier part stood out to me. Having family you feel a connection to and have love / good feelings for is a luxury also a joy that is gifted to you from those older than you are. That you felt it important to take the family to go see their elder is wonderful. You cared not only for her but wanted to pass that feeling down to your children. The memories you describe while seeming a hardship to the modern reader formed a bond with your grandparents, you being willing to do those chores for them is both a testament to your upbringing but how you cared for their well-being. They must have been very grateful to you for doing those things for them.
A grand post of your memories. Hugs. Scottie.
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Your insights are pretty damn accurate. To gather that much from the post, is very impressive!
It’s unfortunate that we live so far away from family. I’ve been so busy with day to day shit, for so many decades, It’s extremely difficult to make a trip to Ia. That is a luxury. And a regret.
Having kids, and pets, and always something needing fixing around here, I don’t get a holiday! Kids can take care of themselves now, but barely lol.
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Hey Shelldigger! Sorry about your loss. I remember having to put my grandma in a home. I brought in a carpet cleaner to refresh her house so we could put it on the market and I balled. Probably scared the hell out of him haha It was just devastating though. She lived in the nursing home for 2 years by the time she finally passed. Amazingly, her passing wasn’t actually as hard. The “end of her life” as we all had known it previously was when we put her in that home. By the time she left, there was an overwhelming sense of peace.
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